An Amazing Invention!

While thumbing through old National Geographic magazines as a kid, I was captured by the description of Kayan women who stretched their necks and legs.  These ladies took body mod to a whole new level, long before gauges and studs-in-odd-places were de rigueur in the Midwest. 

I'm happy to report that now this bizarre rift of nature is available through an Amazing Direct Offer of $14.95!   That's right, and it works for both men and women!

Now, I know we're being told it's for neck and shoulder pain, but here's the truth.  It's just another sly method to turn us into zombies.  Pretty soon they'll be offering trephination for headaches and leaches for bad dispositions.  That gentle lifting sensation you're feeling as you "pump till the support feels just right" is the circulation being cut off to your brain, folks!

My fave part?  You can mail your check to Dept WET 345 in Sarasota.  WET?  Of all the department codes they had to pick from, somebody chose WET?